3 True observations about The Royal Couple, William and Kate (which you definitely won’t read anywhere else, and if you do it’s because some tosser has copied and pasted my post)

What I love about the title of this post is that nobody can argue with it! Had I have said “True facts about The Royal Couple” I’d no doubt have received a major, elitist back-lash of emails pointing out how wrong I am. Sorry elitists, you’ll have to find someone else to…be elitist to. (I wouldn’t know the name for that, not being an elitist myself.)

1) Prince William has literally no choice but to walk with a fiendishly smug smile on his face at all times. If he doesn’t, his scalp moves in such a way as to dislodge what remains of his rapidly diminishing head of hair. God help him if he ever ends up getting a divorce…

2) Kate Middleton really is nice. As much as I am not a royalist, I also can’t find anything bad, gossipy or actually interesting to write about her. I’m not sure if that’s a compliment or not. You decide.

3) Prince William must walk with his head tilted at 48 degrees at all times, and is banned from going outside during high (or even medium height) winds. This allows the wind to drift easily over his head, leaving his hair just about able to cling onto his scalp.

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